Friday, May 18, 2012

San Antonio

Finally I am going back to visit Texas...the best state ever!  : )  Ok, I know that will start some trouble but I thought it would be funny to say!  I am getting to go on a last minute trip to SA to visit some dear friends.  How awesome is that right?!  I am very excited and thankful to Matt,  who bought me this ticket, and my friend Bekah who is taking care of the kiddos.  Side note, Bekah is a single 23 year old who has very little babysitting experience.....can we say "birth control."  She will never want kids after next week!  : )  So I have a confession....I am struggling a little with this trip.  Once again it is the "what ifs."  What if I get sick because of the heat?  What if it is hard to leave like it was last time?  What if my friends don't like this "new" me?  These are all so ridiculous I know!  I was telling my father-in-law my "what ifs" and he had a very wise answer for me.  He said you are inward about being more outward focused.  You (me) need to go there wanting to serve others not worried about yourself.  That is why I love that man....he has great advice!  

Thursday, May 17, 2012


We have 5 loud snorers in my family (the two that don't are me and my 14 yr old)  So my 7 year old asks me if he snores....and I answer yes buddy you do.  So he thinks for a minute and says know mommy, papa snores louder than anyone I loud you can hear it thru two I think he taught daddy to snore and now daddy is teaching me.  : )

Top 7 List

These are just fun things I want/can do again when this flare up ends and I am "normal" again....

7.  Finally get a pedicure....ahhhhhhhhh....need I say more! : )

6.  Won't have to say "Don't touch mommy's legs/feet" anymore.  That is getting old!  I am not angry about it, I just want to be able to have my kiddos jump on me and it not feel like a major injury.  So after saying it to one of my 9 yr olds she asks, "Mommy, if I lick your feet will that hurt?"  Gross, right?!

5.  No more meds.  This is a two parter.  One, the meds make my stomach sick sometimes and two they make me talk different and act different.  Sometimes I make no sense at all, or I might just spill my water and have no idea I did it!

4.  Run more 1/2 marathons and maybe some fun 5Ks.  I am so addicted.  Indy was so fun.  I really want to be thankful for that experience and not be greedy for more but I am struggling! 

3.  To have my children see healing and that they can pray for someone else.  Their little hearts have been so sweet to watch as they constantly pray for me.  My 7 year old runs in my room and I am in bed not feeling well last week.  He wraps his arms around my neck and prays "Dear God, heal my mom Lord Father (He seriously says Lord, God, or Father 20 times in this prayer).  Thank you for this day.  You are God and that is never going to change. Amen"  Then he runs back out.  Too cute!

2.  Wear my Toms again.  (My feet burn and go crazy in shoes or socks.)  After Yellow Box Sandals these are my fav.  Plus since they give a child a pair of shoes for each pair you buy it is more like a ministry...or at least that is what I try to get Matt to believe!  : ) 

1.  Be able to sleep on my side.  I have been sleeping on my back ONLY since the first week of April!

If I think of any more silly things I will post them.  : )

Magic Mouthwash

I thought I would let ya'll know the recipe for "Magic Mouthwash."  Why?  Cuz even with insurance that silly thing cost me $35.50 for a little bottle!  It is equal parts of milk of magnesia, benedryl, and lidocaine.  Sounds yummy, right?!  Your food taste gross BUT it numbs your entire mouth and your lips.  : ) can only buy lidocaine online thru Canadian pharmacies....or at least that is the only way we found.  So I guess that means I will be going back to Walgreens if I need a refill! 

Indy Mini - Race Day Pics

In case you missed my update to the "God is Good!" post here are the pics I wanted to share with y'all...

Before the Race w/great friends Jay and Terri

During the race at Mile 4 w/Terri (Jay was at 10 Mile...he's a stud!)

After the race!!!!

Saturday, May 12, 2012

What's next?

As I have been walking through this journey, the one thing I have wanted to keep a hold on is my closeness with Christ.  I want His Spirit in me to stay strong.  A few days after the marathon I was talking to a friend about this and saying I was wondering what was next for me.  Well God didn't make me wait to find out!!!  That same day I felt this small bump on the roof of my mouth and thought I must of just burned big deal.  I ended up going to a dentist two days later because the entire roof of my mouth was raw and I couldn't eat at all.  He then referred me to an oral surgeon who told me there is nothing to do but wait.....this is becoming a pattern in my life.  I wonder if God wants me to learn patience?!  : )  He wasn't sure if this was related to my other issues in my spine.  To add to this mouth thing I was literally hot one minute, actually sweating...then the next I was freezing. I also was nauseous, dizzy, and lightheaded all day....basically had to stay in bed.  This was from Monday until yesterday.  Not a great week by most people's standards.  Oh, I forgot to add that the oral surgeon gave me this "Magic Mouthwash" (actually called that) so I can gargle it before eating to numb my mouth.  It does numb it but it tastes horrible and makes all my food taste the same way!  So that is the background to what I am wanting to really write about.  I am so thankful I had such a hard was one of the hardest so far.  I had been slipping away from the Lord.  The medicine I am taking helps me walk now so I slowly started getting back into the "busyness" of life.  Not huge things, but big enough that I was not spending enough time with Him.  That changed my behavior, my attitude towards Matt and the kids, and towards others.  I was in bed crying (which I think I have done more of these past couple weeks than in my entire life!!), and just begging for healing from everything and my friend then told me this is your answered prayer.  What?!  She so nicely reminded me I had asked "What's next?" a few days ago.  At first I was like whatever, but then a little later I realized she was right.  God loves me so much that he slowed me down again.  He didn't let me go weeks or months or years and slip away.  After a few days He brought me back.  I am praying that if He is tugging on any one's heart right now that you will come back to Him.  His love is unbelievable and so is His joy and peace.  Nothing in this world could ever beat it!!  : )    

Sunday, May 6, 2012

God is GOOD!

Before the Race w/great friends Jay and Terri
  I am not sure if I should tell ya'll right away if I made it till the end of marathon or make you read the entire entry first......I think I'll wait!  : )  We left Friday morning for Indiana, which is about 5 hours away, and had a fun time with our friends Jay and Terri in the car.  I feel as if I need to let ya'll know I am a blogger liar....I posted that we were leaving in two hours after my post on Friday BUT our friends were a little late and we didn't leave until around 4 hours later!  We got to Indy, picked up our packets (which were full of some great goodies), bought the neatest non-slip headbands (, and ate at noodles and company.  Side note...our hotel had the freakiest elevator!!  It was like walking into your own coffin.  It was only big enough to fit in four people and the entire thing was dark wood paneling.  It even had a switch to turn the light on and off....which of course the boys always wanted to turn off!  I had to pray before I went in every time.  We got to the race Saturday morning and it was crazy!  32,000 people all lined up and everyone sooo different and wearing some fun outfits...there were even some firefighters in full gear!  We had about 20-30 beach balls going around and fireworks were going off right before the race started.  It was so fun right from the beginning.  : )  The race started and I was already getting choked up just being there.  I couldn't believe that I had given this up over a month ago and two weeks ago God said go.  So the race starts and my feet are already burning....they do NOT like socks or shoes!  But, it wasn't anything that made me want to stop.  We got to mile 3, stopped to use the restroom, have our gu, and went right back to running.  It was so fun seriously......both sides of the road were lined with bands and people cheering for you.  Oh, I forgot to tell ya'll something...before we started, Terri and I asked for a sign from God to encourage us....we decided to ask to see the color orange (it is the color used for MS).  No joke people, we saw this color everywhere from balloons to signs on the telephone poles.  It was so cool.  : )

During the race at Mile 4 w/Terri (Jay was at 10 Mile...he's a stud!)
Back to the run...Matt was waiting for us on mile 4 and that was great to see him.  On mile 6 we entered the Indy 500 race track.  I have to say that when you see the cars go around the track it looks LOTS smaller than when you are running it!!!  It is 2 1/2 miles long with no was like the never ending track!  By then we had also decided we were done with the Gatorade they were tasted horrible...I think it was the flavor that they never sold.  I felt really good so far...the burning in my feet started getting a little worse around mile 6 but it didn't get any worse after that.  Terri and I were having a great time laughing, singing, and talking to other runners.  It was like a big party!  : )  Around mile 9 it started feeling like a knife was being stabbed into my toe every so often....later after I took my shoes off there was a blister on that toe....go figure!  : )  I just kept thinking I can't believe God has given me the strength to make it this far.  The humidity was about 95% and it was getting around 75 degrees but I still felt good.  Then shortly after mile 10 that all changed.  As crazy as this sounds it wasn't my feet that started was my left knee.  At first I could walk about 10-20 steps and that would be enough to stretch it out and then I could run again but by mile 11 1/2 I honestly thought I was not going to be able to finish.  I kept praying Lord I want to finish but more than anything I want to praise you if I don't.  I think also from this point on I was crying.  I was crying from the pain and also because I couldn't believe I was able to keep taking step after step.  Terri didn't have her ipod so she shared my headphones and we started singing and worshipping God and it was really awesome.  We had been singing and praying on and off the entire race but from this point on we didn't stop.  Another side note...Terri is awesome!  Seriously, she had been training up until we left and could have run circles around me, but she ran at my pace the entire time and did not complain...I am SO lucky to have a friend like that!  I need to mention that we were still seeing orange everywhere!!  At mile 12 (or a little after) I told Terri I didn't think I was going to be able to make it, so she grabbed my hand and held it until we crossed the finish line!!  God used her to not allow me to quit....I can't even remember it without tears rolling down my face.  I was limping, crying, and trying to see where we were supposed to go to find our husbands.  After grabbing our medals, food, and taking our race photo (which we of course took together), we found Jay and Matt.  I just sobbed on Matt's chest for a few moments before I could talk.  We started back to the hotel room but I didn't make it....the pain in my knee was so crazy and I started feeling dizzy (due to lack of water and emotions I am sure), that Jay had to come and pick me up.  We packed and headed back home!  : )  God is so good, He truly doesn't begin a work in you and not finish it.  I can NOT believe I finished that marathon.  But really I didn't, God in me did.  He is so powerful, so wonderful, so amazing, and this God who made the earth and all that we see by just speaking enabled me to run 13.1 miles!!!  I feel like my words are so inadequate for how I want to praise Him.  I also feel like I don't have the words to say how ya'lls prayers lifted me up while I was running.  Thank you so much........ 
After the race!!!!

Friday, May 4, 2012

Tomorrow is the BIG day!!

This will be my last post for a couple of days because we are leaving in 2 hrs for Indy!  what what?!  : ) 
Saturday is the big day!  Specific prayer requests:  our safety...that there would be cool weather (we already received a heat advisory for Saturday from the race officials and I am not supposed to be overheated!)...that if it is His will I will complete this marathon...and if I don't complete it I will still praise Him!  Thank you!!!

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Mile 2!

So...I ran 2 miles today!!!  Kinda humbling to realize that about 5 weeks ago I ran 10 miles and was so excited and now I am excited for 2.  : ) I have realized I have not updated on how I am feeling / doing.  So here it is:  My doctor upped my meds so I take quite a bit of Gabapentin every day.  It is actually a seizure medicine used for epilepsy but it also works for dulling nerve pain.  So there is no more burning and I can walk!  : )  I still have the numbness and tingling and also the hot flashes if I am walking too much.  There are also some side effects...I am wobbly and a little dizzy, my hands shake which make it somewhat difficult to type correctly (the backspace button has become my best friend), I feel a little like I am going to throw up all day, and I can't talk well.  What I mean by talking well is I say the wrong vowels a "kids get on the van" or "you dropped something out of your picket," I also can't say the word I is in my head but won't come out of my mouth or I can't think of the word I want to say at all.  As you can imagine my family is having fun with this!!  : )  I can also get a little foggy and delayed in my reflexes so I try not to drive to far from home.  BUT...seriously I praise God I can walk...the other things don't matter!  : )  Also my Dr. called yesterday and gave me the go ahead with the marathon...he said just take it slow and stay hydrated!  I was VERY excited to hear that....even though I think I would of gone anyway...don't tell my mom that!  : )  Here is something I wanted to share that I read in my devotions today.  I am reading in Judges and it is about Samson, who I know many of you know the story.  The part I want to share, though, is before he was born.  So the angel of the Lord appeared to Samson's mother who they call Manoah's wife (Samson's dad).  He tells her she is going to have a son and gives her the directions for raising him.  Then she tells her husband what happened and he believes her which is so cool because remember how the disciples didn't believe the women who told them Jesus had risen.  So anyway he then prays to the Lord saying "Lord, please let the man of God come back to us again and give us more instructions about this son who is to be born."  He wanted more!  More wisdom in raising his son.  I just stopped and prayed, "Lord I want more...more wisdom in being a wife, mother, daughter, friend."  I always want to want more of God, more of His wisdom!  Ok, then the angel does come back and gives them more instructions and they want to prepare a goat for him to eat and he says I will not eat it but instead ya'll (ok, maybe he didn't say ya'll) may prepare it for a burnt offering as a sacrifice to the Lord.  Then it says Manoah didnt' realize it was the angel of the Lord and asked the angel his name.  The angel replies, "Why do you ask my name?  It is too wonderful for you to understand."  Then as they are offering their sacrifice the angel of Lord ascends up to heaven in the fire and the couple realized they had seen God.  So here is what I think is so awesome....we know our God's name!  We don't have to ask!  We can talk to him anytime...we don't have to wait around.  Do I fully understand the blessing I have to have my bible, to know my God, to be able to talk to him without any priest, to have HIS SPIRIT, God himself living in me?!  How cool is that?!?!  : )